There are few people we can be truly honest with in our lives. They are the ones with whom we can let down our entire guard, allow our emotions to run their course, and offer our disappointments and doubts. We cannot do it with everyone, but there are a few that are safe, a few that will receive us as we are no matter what.
Two sisters and a brother were those people for Jesus, and Jesus was that for them. Mary, Martha, and Lazarus had a deep friendship with Jesus. It was Mary who fell at Jesus’s feet and anointed his feet with her hair and oil (John 11:2; John 12:1–8). It was Martha whom we can find being completely honest with Jesus when her sister leaves her in the kitchen with all the work (Luke 10:38–42). It was Lazarus who was described as being loved by Jesus (John 11:3, 36). Jesus loved this family, and with this depth of love came the freedom to be themselves, to be honest in their disappointment, to be vulnerable with their tears, and to offer Jesus their whole selves, stopping short of nothing (John 11:5).
unmoved
Knowing Jesus well, the sisters sent Jesus a message, “Lord, the one whom you love is ill” (John 11:3). You would expect Jesus to respond with, “Okay, I’m coming right away.” But he didn’t. He said some cryptic words about his illness not leading to death and being for God’s glory (John 11:4). Then he stayed two days longer where he was. He seemed to be unfazed by the sisters’ news, and then said plainly, “He is dead” (John 11:14). He followed this with another cryptic statement: “I am glad that I was not there, so that you may believe” (John 11:15). What was Jesus up to? Did he not see their pain? Did he not feel it either?
honesty welcome
Jesus then began moving toward Bethany, the sisters’ hometown. Martha heard he was coming and went to meet him, being honest about her disappointment and her expectation of Jesus. “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died” (John 11:21).
Later in the story, Mary came to Jesus and said the exact same thing, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died” (John 11:32).
The community responded with, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying?” (John 11:37). Another fair question. And Jesus welcomed it all.
himself
Jesus eventually raised Lazarus from the dead. He had his purposes in waiting as well as his welcome of grief, confusion, and questions. Jesus did not rush to resurrection, and he met Mary, Martha, and the people with his own humanity as well. Yes, he will resurrect, but there is something in the waiting that he has for each person. He has himself. Waiting for resurrection gave Martha, Mary, and the people more of him. And that is what he gives us as well.
I have some many stories. My whole life is a story.
Many stories and many disappointments, e.g., my daughter’s motor vehicle accident, which left her with a brain injury, and 15 years later her brutal homicide; ex husband’s addiction and the impact this had on our lives. I am not sure what God wants me to do with these areas of my life. If there is any benefit In using these areas of my life, I am here God- take my feet and guide me.
I have big questions about the formative years of my life. I am reminded that you want me to come to you regardless of how I come. I wonder about the impact on each of my family member’s and why nothing was ever spoken about. Ultimately God I pray if it is your will that those experiences build my knowledge of who you are in the same way that Mary and Martha were spiritually matured through their wait on you, eventually receiving a deeper revelation about who you are.
Right now, in this very moment, I am questioning myself on. y career choices, some things are not easy, I know God sees the bigger picture, but it’s lime and lemons for me all this time. I’m choosing to trust in this waiting period and deepen my relationship with Him, It’s all I’ve got.
I wanted Jesus to save my aunt from dying from cancer. I prayed and prayed that He would bring her back just as He did Lazarus. I knew I would continue to love and honor God regardless of the outcome but the pain has never gone away…our family was forever changed the day she left us…I wish I knew why it was more important to take her then give us more time with her. I guess it’s time to lay down my grief at Jesus’ feet.
When a young pastor’s family lost their 18 yr old son to a shooting accident, it was devastating. They have handled it so amazing! They are mourning their loss, but rejoicing his reunion with Jesus. Their lives are forever changed. They have beautiful memories of their son, and amazing visions of him sitting with God. Somehow, good will come of this.
Yes. I prayed and had faith as big as a mustard seed and knew God will heal my mum and that will be a miracle. My mum was there for everyone and put everyone before her. She loved God so much. She served in church. She served others before herself but she died. It broke my heart and I lost faith in God, in life, in being good etc.
I have questions about my current life as a full time stepmom. I know God wanted me to marry my wonderful husband of 5 years, but every single years has been such a struggle with the other parent refusing to co-parent (there are mental health issues involved too). This year it has been a bit better, but I sometimes feel disappointed that it has been so hard. Is this what God really wanted me to do? I know deep down, God wanted me to walk this journey with my husband, who was a single father of three after the divorce and has endured much verbal abuse and even physical assault from the former spouse, for the sake of his children. But my human nature feels disappointed it has turned out like this, in this regard. I feel awful even saying that.
Thank you for sharing your story. It sounds incredibly difficult. But Believe that God has given you this for a purpose. Don’t doubt your marriage because it’s not what you expected, continue to come to the Lord & pour out your hurts to Him. He has placed you where you are for a purpose, don’t let disappointment rob you of your present.
I know my Dad is in good hands with you Lord. You blessed me abundantly with having the best Dad I could ever have. I am so grateful and can’t thank you enough. Thank you that my Father did not suffer. I know he is loving you as he loves his family with his whole heart. I have such great memories and pray I will see him when you feel it is time.
I was devastating and disbelieving when my youngest brother sudden death in a choking accident at 2016. He was 36 years old and followed after my father’s footstep to heaven in less than 2 years apart. I have question for God at that time–WHY there were so many tragedies happenned in my family ? My mother didn’t cry and she was calm but later we found out she has kept things inside her and depressed. I have to put my trust in God in this difficult circumstances. I couldn’t depend on my own understanding, it is far beyond my knowledge to handle this situation.
Here I am –
I cry to you, O Lord; I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.”
Psalm 142:5
I have to be completely honest to God and He himself would heal my pains. I will meet my father and brother again in heaven someday for sure. There would be no more tears….
I am so moved by your story and empathize with your pain, I cry out with you to the Lord who is your portion and refuge in the land of the living. He hears you. His Holy Spirit is with you and will give you comfort. I am praying for you, Liwen, to receive His love and for Him to show you all the abundance He has for you as you put your trust in Him.
– Kate